TRASH TRUCK!!!!

You can feel the rumbling and hear the squealing before you ever see it.  Squeaky brakes, clanging cans, revving engine, grinding gears.  Waiting, listening, watching and then...it appears!  The TRASH TRUCK!

The driver is greeted with squeals of delight, waving hands, and smiles of anticipation provided by a complete squad of cheerleaders ages 2 to 5 years.  She waves back and off she goes.

This cheering section is a weekly occurrence at my child care program.  It truly is one of the most exciting moments in our program each week.  Actually every other week it happens twice because it is a recycle week.  While I know that this is going to happen every week, I have honestly never taken time to watch the trash truck - until today.  As I stood on the deck watching the kids I did something I had never done before, I watched the trash truck.  I've seen the trash truck a zillion times but until today I had never taken the time to watch exactly what it does. I watched as the yellow arm lowered down to my trash can and scooped it up.  Slowly the yellow arm raised up above the truck and slowly turned our garbage can upside down.  As the can was held upside down, bag after bag fell through the air and into the back of the truck.  Once it was empty the big yellow arm slowly turned the can upright and sat it back down by the fence and drove away.

The whole trash truck visit got me to thinking.  What else was going on in my childcare that I wasn't taking time to watch and enjoy.  I am the first one to admit that I sometimes get swept up in the tasks of the day, the problems, the frustrations and forget to stop and enjoy the day.

It seems sometimes that too many days go by and I realize I have gotten caught up in the product of child care (the stress - the problems) vs. the process (enjoying the children and the work we do).  Seriously now, have you ever thought about what a blessing it is to be a childcare provider?  What other career pays someone to play, explore, create, and be a part of the most important years of a child's life?

I found some words of wisdom in a book called, "100 Ways to Build Self-Esteem & Teach Values" by Diana Loomans that I'd like to share.  These words help me to remember the importance of what I do and how much I truly love my career choice.  They help me to live in the moment and not spend my days waiting for weekend.

If I had my child to raise over again,
I’d finger paint more, and point the finger less.
I’d do less correcting, and more connecting.
I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less, and know to care more.
I’d take more hikes and fly more kites.
I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I’d run through more fields, and gaze at more stars.
I’d do more hugging and less tugging.

  I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.

I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later.

I’d teach less about the love of power,

And more about the power of love. 

 

What did you take time to stop and enjoy in your program today?  this week?  Are you taking the time, to take the time, to enjoy the children in your program?  Can you name three discoveries the children in your program made today?  this week?  Do you have a harder time focusing on the joy of your job because of issues with the children or issues with their parents?  Are you living for the weekend? 

 



 

   

Is the Heart Missing?

I recently had a conversation with one of my child care moms about an interim director at her place of business.  There has been a large staff turnover in higher up management positions and she was telling me that the new director had held a meeting and wanted to talk about whatever questions the staff might have.   It was clear that people were not comfortable asking questions.  My child care mom is a strong person and wanted answers, so she asked one of the most burning ones - why did everyone leave?  The director addressed the question head on and a change in the room began.

As the meeting progressed my child care mom felt that the new interim director had something that was missing from the last director - heart.  She had empathy and compassion for the staff.  She genuinely wanted the staff to be happy in their job and happy in general.  My child care mom went on to say that it felt almost "freeing" after having been through the previous management style that didn't value employee happiness and satisfaction.

I have been a child care provider for the last 21 years.  In addition to being a child care provider, I am the state coordinator for the family child care network in my state and a trainer.  In my work with other providers I work hard to help them understand the important role they play in the lives of the families they serve and that child care is a profession.

My mom hit on one of the exact messages I try to convey to the providers I mentor and train.  That message is - if you put your whole heart into your child care program the dynamic of your child care program will change.  You can't run your child care program halfheartedly.  You can't have interactions and exchanges with the children in your care halfheartedly.  You can't build a relationship with the families in your program halfheartedly.  It has to be all or nothing to truly be successful. 

Now I know there are people out there that are going to say that if you give yourself wholeheartedly you will crash and burn.  That's where as a professional you have to find ways to fight burnout and stress and incorporate them into your daily routine.

As I was writing this blog post I was thinking about the years that I have felt totally satisfied as a provider and the ones I have not and I had yet another EPIPHANY!  The years that I felt less satisfied were years that I was not giving myself whole-heartedly to my program!

Were there reasons I wasn't giving myself wholeheartedly?  Yes.  Are there reasons we as providers do not go all out?  Of course.  In order to go all out that means we have to open ourselves up, heart and soul, to the families in our program and that leaves opportunity for us to be hurt or disappointed.  There are numerous factors that play a role in how much of ourselves we can put into our program at any given time.  We may be dealing with financial issues, or loss of a loved one, or confusion about our career choice, or a million other things.  What we need to remember is that as long as we are working in the child care profession we have to stay focused and give ourselves wholeheartedly for the good of ourselves and the children in our program.

Are you giving yourself wholeheartedly to your program?  Why or why not?  How do you as a provider make the families/children in your program care?  What do you do to show them that you care?  How do you show that they matter to you?  Do they matter to you?  Do you open yourself up to have an honest, open relationship with those in your program or is it  just "going through the motions?"  Do you actually care about the families in your program or are they simply a paycheck?

Our winner is....

Sabrina Caston. 

Sabrina can you private message me with you address and gift card preference and I'll get it in the mail.

Thanks to all participated.

Let's Have a Contest!

I am having a contest.

Everyone who follows this blog and then posts a comment on this post will be entered into a drawing for $20 gift card of their choice.

Deadline to enter is midnight Saturday, August 10th.

Let's start a following :)

Walter

There have been three Walters in my life. 

This is the first Walter.  For those of you too young to remember him, this is Walter Cronkite.  Walter Cronkite was the news anchor for CBS for many years.  Everyone loved him and at one point a survey ranked him as the most trusted man in America.  I lost both of my grandpas at a young age and decided that I wanted Walter Cronkite to be my new grandpa.  Of course that never happened but it was one of my dreams as a little girl.



 



                                                    

 

This is the second Walter.  Walter is my oldest daughter's dog.  Years ago we were at a cookout at a campground out in the middle of nowhere.  This little white dog was running around visiting all those attending.  After a while he kind of settled in with our immediate group.  I asked the campground manager whose dog he was.  The manager said someone had left him there a few weeks ago.  He had let him stay thinking maybe the person would return but they never did.  Since it was obvious they were not coming back he had decided he was going to have to take him to a shelter because he couldn't find him a home.  Long story short - my daughter and her roommate took him in.  I'm sure just by looking at him you can tell he has a bit of an attitude. Walter immediately won my heart.  There aren't many people who actually like him but we have a special connection.

 

When it came time to name him we kicked around numerous names.  One of the names I put out there was Walter.  Not just Walter but Walter Cronkite. For some reason he reminded me of Walter Cronkite.  Truth be told I think it had something to do with his bushy eyebrows and gruff kind of exterior.  While he seemed all "crunchy" on the outside I knew he was mush on the inside. 

 

 

This is the third Walter.  Walter came to my child care program when he was just a few weeks old and stayed until Kindergarten. 

 

When Walter's mom called to talk about child care openings she was unaware that I was at a point in my career where I had decided I was not going to do infant care anymore.  She explained to me that she and her hubby had been on an adoption waiting list and there was a little boy that they could adopt.  There was only one problem - he was ready to be placed NOW.  We all know how hard it is to find child care let alone infant care.  I explained to her that I wasn't sure I was going to do infant care anymore.  She asked me to think about it and get back to her.  I did as she asked and put deep thought into whether or not I wanted to do infant care.  I came to the conclusion that I did not.  When she called I was trying to find a way to break the news to her that I had decided not to take her child.  Before I could tell her my decision she began to talk about her little guy.  I asked her what his name was and she said (you guessed it) "His name is James, but we are going to call him by his middle name Walter!

 

Okay I don't know about you, but I am a "signs" type of person.  Not the Mel Gibson alien in the pantry type of signs but a sign that makes me feel something inside.  What are the odds of anyone in this day and age naming their child Walter?  For me the name Walter stirred strong, happy memories for me.  I knew that this child was supposed to be a part of my child care.  Did I ever regret my decision?  No.  Walter went on to be one of the most intelligent, happy-go-lucky children that has been in my program.

 

What is the bottom-line reason I am sharing my Walter stories with you?  I want you to recognize and respect the little voice inside of you.  You know the one.  The one that starts talking when you are about to make a decision that might or might not be the right one.  Trust your feelings, don't talk yourself out of them.  I know a lot of people that would disagree with running a business like this but I firmly believe that you have to go on gut instinct when running a family child care program.  Family child care is a very unique situation.  Your family and your business are truly intertwined  in a that no other career is.  What other profession invites their clients into their home?  to interact with their family day-to-day? 

 

Follow your heart when making decisions.  When I say this I don't mean to the detriment of your child care program or your own family (like letting a child care family rack up a huge child care bill or constantly letting them walk all over you) but rather doing what you know is right.  It may not always seem like it, but it's true - you are the only one in control of your program.  Make it what YOU want it to be! 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 



Epiphany or Exhaustion?



Do you ever feel like you are too tired to do child care anymore?  Be a parent anymore?  I went through a period of time thinking that.  A situation would arise and I would think to myself, "no big deal - no one's bleeding, there's no danger, does this really matter?" and I would let the situation unfold without intervention.  As time went on I noticed situations like this happening more and more frequently.  I began to think, "Wow have I just stopped caring?  Should I be looking for a new career?" and then one day I had an EPIPHANY!  It wasn't that I was too tired to intervene or worry about the situations, I had learned to appreciate the process vs. the product. 

Understanding the importance the process plays in child development is something all child care providers should know and incorporate into their programs.  It's important to watch for opportunities to let the children "drive the bus" (Note:  It's okay to let the children drive the bus :) but not the pigeon!    If you don't understand this statement let me know and I'll explain it because you are missing out!)

One of the most recent opportunities I had to let a child take the lead involved my grandson.  This is Rowan and he is one and a half.

 

 

The other night Rowan was drinking out of a large, tall water bottle.  After taking a few swigs he disappeared into the kitchen.  Moments later he returned with the water bottle and a small glass.  As his mom, dad and I watched he sat the glass down on my living room floor and quickly began to pour the water from the bottle into the glass.  Needless to say, gravity took over and the water came swooshing out, overshot the glass and made a puddle on the carpet.  He was so focused on the task at hand he didn't notice the puddle but readjusted the angle of the bottle and successfully filled the glass, handed the water bottle to his dad and took a drink from the glass.

 

At that moment he looked up at the three of us with a look of accomplishment on his face.  His dad went to the kitchen and brought back paper towels and started cleaning up the puddle.  As he watched his dad clean up the puddle the expression on his face became concerned.  It was clear to see he was starting to feel bad for what had happened.  In that split second I had the opportunity to celebrate his accomplishment and fuel his sense of accomplishment or I could intensify the sense of embarrassment and uncertainty that was building.  I decided to celebrate the task he had conquered.  I told him "Way to go!  You poured your water like a big boy!" and gave him a high five. 

 

 

 

 

Would I have always responded this way?  No.  I have to admit as a young parent or even as a new child care provider I tended to "sweat the small stuff."  Years ago I  probably would have said something about the mess and how we needed to clean it up.  The conversation would more than likely have also included a statement about "next time let me or your mom or dad help you."  

 

For young children the process is key.  It's through the process that they learn.  Process allows them to practice whatever skill they are trying to master.  That could be a fine or gross motor skill, a social skill, a problem solving skill or a conflict resolution skill.  I once read an article that said learning is an individual process.  If this is a true statement, which I believe it is, then we are providers must allow child-directed process to occur.

 

Take a moment to think about these questions.   Do you allow the children in your program to drive the bus?  Do you intervene or do you let them problem solve?  Are you willing to expand on something of interest to the children or is your day dictated by a schedule?  Do your parents understand the importance of the process vs. the product?  How can you help the children you serve fuel their fires?  When children think back about the time the spent with you, will they remember what they made or what they did? 

 





I.M.A.G.I.N.E.

As providers we can get bogged down with the day-to-day challenges we face:  parents who are late with payments, children that bite, family members who are less than supportive of our chosen profession, and a long list of other things too long to list.  Often when faced with the day-to-day issues we lose sight of the importance of our work.

To help myself remember the role I play as a provider I try to live my life by one simple word:  Imagine.  In my life imagine stands for "I make a genuine impact - NO exceptions!"  This reminds me that whatever I say or do has an impact on the children in my care.

Every once in a while a child comes a long who makes a strong impact on us.  For me that was Madi.  Madi came to our program as a brand-new, six week old little bundle of adorable.  From the first moment I held her I was hooked.  I knew she was one of those children I would never forget.  What I didn't realize at that moment was that I would be a person in her life whom she would not forget.

Madi was in our program until she was old enough to go off to kindergarten.  The weeks leading up to her leaving were hard on all of us.  There would be days where there were tears, days there was laughter, and days where we just spend quiet time together.  After she started Kindergarten she would call us just to check in - let us know how school was going for her and see how things were going for us.

One night during a Parent's Night Out event at our child care our doorbell rang.  I opened the door to find Madi's bright, smiling face.  Madi's mom apologized for not calling but explained Madi had made something for me and wanted to surprise me with it.

This picture was my gift.  I took it from her speechless.  Madi had no way of knowing that I had just finished a particularly difficult child care week and was actually questioning whether or not what I did truly made an impact.  With one small gesture she reminded me that everything I did was for a reason.  It was the answer I needed - yes I do make a difference!

In these uncertain times in the early care and education field it is more important than ever that we as providers remember that we do make a difference!  We touch the lives of the future everyday.  Everything we say, everything we don't say, everything we do, everything we don't do, makes an impact.  The questions we need to ask ourselves everyday are, "Did we make a positive impact?  A lasting impact?  Did we do all we can do to be the best provider we can be for the children in our care?"